Thankful 2016: Outlaw Maps

Thus continues one of my favourite traditions: The top 10 moments I am thankful for since last Thanksgiving. I'd like to thank the theme of "Outlaw Maps" for this year.

10. Friendsmas in Prague- Traveling solo can be hard, but sometimes you find a person or group you just click with. I was lucky enough to have this happen twice in Prague. When you meet people who influence your journey in such a positive way it's impossible to not be grateful. I love us!

9. Lake Bled Wanderings- I spent the whole day just walking around the Lake enjoying the beauty and wishing that my life could always be this simple and easy.

8. Theth National Park- I had wanted to go so badly when I lived in Albania, but never quite made it. A beautiful autumn weekend hiking among the colours with new friends.

7. Damien Rice concert, random ride- I should refer to my previous blog, but...basically I had to let go of some serious control issues in a foreign country where I had no idea how to get back to my hostel after the buses stopped running. So making friends with and inspiring random strangers was where it was at!

6. Klet mountain- I love myself because I am able to just try new things. Including going on a hike that there is almost zero information about. And then...it just happens that it is a tradition to hike to the top of it on this particular day. Much enjoyed my time dancing with random Czech dudes. Such a a random cultural experience.

5.Wilco in Kotor- Dancing my drunk ass off to one of my favourite bands ever. In a foreign country that I happen to be living in. Yes. Please.

4.Fire in Lubliana- After a very short, and stressful weekend in Slovenia I was lucky enough to unwind at a traditional "Summer's Day" activity. Drinking beers, listening to live local music, and burning a crazy large fire near a church on the top of hill. Who could ask for more? Fire, Music, Beer, and Culture is exactly what I am seeking.

3.Tatra Mountains- I had a very rough morning of travel that did not go according to plan. But I made it to Zakopane and completed a decently hard hike by myself. Some of the people I met along the way asked me if I was scared to be hiking alone. I realized how much independence I have gained since moving abroad.

2. The Realization-
Sunset. Tivat. And realizing what I ultimately didn't want to admit to myself. Walking home from Porto beaming after texting my mom, because I had to tell SOMEONE.

1. Comment about mom with backpack- So, on the final day of my summer travel I was on a ferry with my parents and noticed a woman carrying an ULTRA LARGE backpack as her 5? year old daughter follower her around holding a doll. I told my mom that someday, that would potentially be me. My mom said it could never ever be me, and I frowned at her in disappointment at her close mindedness.
Only, then, she said something that really inspired and encouraged me. She said, "That could never be you, because your daughter will have her own backpack on her back." That right there is everything I wish and hope for.

And here is to next years theme of "Trusting Things Beyond Mistake."

If These Walls Could Talk

Oh yeah...

So while I was traveling in the Baltics this summer I had a very emotional response to a deserted prison I visited. The following day I went to yet another desert prison where the guard actually locked me in a cell for about 10 seconds.

One night while enjoying a delicious beer I ended up writing a very sad poem. I used to write a lot of shit poetry back in high school, but haven't really written any since. I know this is likely crap, but it was a such an emotional break though during my trip that I figured I should save it.

I had actually forgotten about this until I came across it last evening while enjoying a few beers at home.

If these walls could talk

The description they would cower

Of a man in uniform

Drunk with the power

Of enforcing his rules on everyone.

If these walls could talk

They would surely scream

About the locked up prisoner

Dying to dream

Of a hopeful future of joy and love.

If these walls could talk

The narrative they would speak

Of the shiny tear

That began to leak

From the eyes of the girl who felt too many aches.

If these walls could talk

The story they would say

There was a woman who sat

Down on the rock to pray

For the world to learn from its past mistakes.

If these walls could talk

They would gladly confess

About the teenager

With a backpack and odd dress

Holding cans of paint, an empty wall cured.

If these walls could talk

They would kindly inform

Of the plants that wriggled through

Hard concrete to be born

Bringing beauty to the ugly and feared.

If these walls could talk

The tale they would tell

Of a traveling girl

Who completely fell

In love with the abandoned beauty.

Musings from Belgrade

26/10/16
I have realized that far too often I look at people, but don't see them at all.
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I wonder which pictures I will print to hang my house someday. Which experiences will by worthy?
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Looking out this speeding train window wondering where I'll be a year from now, but not feeling lost. I am so grateful to just simply be trusting what I've been given.

27/11/16
The world keeps telling us no, but I just want to say yes.
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I love searching for comfort in discomfort.

28/10/16
I have met many interesting people on this trip, but they all seem to be leaving or already in a large group. I love traveling solo, but man-oh-man is it exhausting.

29/10/16
Suddenly the thing I most want to be is tequila.
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I want to write you a love song with my life.
I have a rule. 3 months is just fun, but longer that 6 months is something.
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Now that I have found my heart beat among the calmness of the mountains, it is time to find it among the chaos of the city. I love you Tivat, but it is time for something different.

30/10/16
I would rather spend my whole life cheering with you and losing, than winning every game. Go Pack Go!
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One different decision and my whole life would be unrecognizable.
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Some days I feel too much and others I feel nothing at all.